In theory, governance in Eritrea is modeled after the Chinese: a political party births the ideas, a government executes them. Thus, in every governmental office–from the nation’s capital down to the sub-zone–there is a party representative. There is a hierarchy in both institutions: in the political party, it is the Secretariat composed of the Secretary General (or Chairman), Secretary, and Heads of Organizational, Political and Economic Affairs. In the government, it is…who cares. It is the party that runs things. But if the party never convenes a congress, never has elections, doesn’t have a functioning central or executive committee, who do the executives report to? Then it becomes what we have: a One Man State. A Man-ocracy. This leads to the question: what the hell does the Secretary do? And, um, who is he?
To answer this burning question, Embassy Media had an interview with the Secretary of the People’s Front (for democracy and justice, but we won’t mention that because if we just stop at People’s Front people will be reminded of the continuity with eritrean PEOPLE’S liberation FRONT), Mr. Alamin Mohammed Seid. Well, no, that is not WHY they interviewed him (we will get to that later), but the point is (and I think you are getting sidetracked here), he is alive, albeit without a job description.
Technically, his job description as a secretary is to run the day-to-day affairs of the party. That is politics and organization. But political affairs is being run by Mr. Yemane Gebreab, and organizational affairs is being run by Mr. Abdella Jaber, but, since in his brief absence (by which we mean in jail without charges since 2013, only five years, which is nothing in the Eritrean calendar of prisons), organizational affairs is also being run by Mr. Yemane Gebreab, this leaves Alamin Mohammed Seid a very important role at the Ministry of We Have Muslims, Too.
You know how the Eritrean political fronts (government and opposition alike) have one SINGLE role for their female members? To deal with “women issues”? Well, actually, two: to deal with women issues AND to prepare injera and xebHi at festivals? Well, in the PFDJ, the role of Mr. Alamin Mohammed Seid (and Mr. Ramadan Mohammed Nur, when he is defrosted) is to be the Face of Diversity. Mind you, this is NOT to assure the Eritrean Muslims that they are represented in the PFDJ (even tone-deaf PFDJ knows that is futile); no, it is to assure Eritrean Christians that the PFDJ is not an exclusive club but very diverse. This is why Alamin Mohammed Seid is brought from the dead only to answer questions of unity and diversity. That is his portfolio: unity, diversity, using the PFDJ Manual.
The World According To Alamin
Eritrea is a very young country, not even 30 years old. Also, the one million year old Homo erectus discovered in the Afar region of Eritrea is clearly an Afar Eritrean woman. Clearly. So, it is also an old nation. But remember, Eritrea is a youthful nation. Also, Islam was introduced to Eritrea before it was spread in Saudi Arabia and Christianity was introduced to Eritrea in the 4th century by Aba Salama who came to Eritrea FIRST. FIRST! You mean St Frumentius, the first Bishop of Axum? The man who converted and baptized the Ethiopian King Ezana to christianity in the 4th century? The king who then Christianized Ethiopia? No, of course the interviewer didn’t ask those questions: he just nodded his head sheepishly as Alamin claimed for Eritrea all things historic. That the sahaba (companions of the prophet) built a mosque in Eritrea is more noteworthy and historic than why they came to begin with: there was a just king in Ethiopia. Or in the Land of Habesha, but that is a word–habesha— that the PF-ers do not like, except when it serves their purpose and here it did so he did.
Axum is an appendage of Adulis. And Axum (the religious see of Aba Salama) is only famous because the British (who apparently were plotting even during the time of Aba Salama, even before they were a nation) found it in their interest to make Axum more famous than Adulis.
We are a young country but an old people. A civilized people with laws. Did I mention we are civilized people? Yes. But very, very young country. Some countries are 200, some countries are 300 years old. But we are not even 30 years old. But, during the Italian occupation, there were 150,000 Eritreans who were enlisted by Italians and it is they who occupied Libya, and Somalia. The number of Eritreans enlisted by Italy is the only page that Messrs Isaias Afwerki and Alamin M Seid read from Zemehret Yohannes’s book Italian Colonialism in Eritrea, (Zemehret himself is no slouch when it comes to history distortion department.) And, explains rambling Alamin, the Italians have never paid reparations for this. If Italians should pay reparations for conscripting 150,000 Eritreans, what does the PFDJ owe us for conscripting millions? Where are my manners: I interrupted the wanasa and derdasha of Alamin: do go on, sir …..There is Via Keren in Somalia and Via Somalia in Akhria so, there. Yeah, it is something. I am sure some of those underage children your PF rounded up from Akhria, disappeared months later, are Eritreans of Somali origin, from Via Somalia. How very civilized we are.
But do go on, PFsplaining, sir. Four hundreds years ago we were writing. Before the Europeans can write! Or, he caught himself, if they wrote, they wrote little. They were in the dark ages! But, sir, one of the world’s most famous writers, a Brit, wrote during this period: William Shakespeare, have you heard of him? Also during this period, another, a Spaniard (also a European) wrote one of the greatest books ever written, Don Quixote, which helps us understand people like you, Mr. Alamin and your PF, always out on futile journeys waging futile wars. Haven’t you heard of them? No, of course, the interviewer didn’t ask that. And what exactly were these great works of literature that we the Eritrean writers with our own alphabets create 400 years ago? We translated the Bible to Tigrinya. And? We also translated the Bible to Tigrinya.
But what he came for, why the interviewer from Embassy Media, PF propaganda outlet, even bothered to interview him was for the same reason Fox News brings in black people to give conservative messages: people unfairly accuse us conservatives of being racists, so we need you to relay our message which you agree with. This won’t convince any blacks, but it will make the whites feel good.
So, here it is. We are a secular country. We are a tolerant country. We are one people: the Saho intermarried with the Tigrinya; the MensaE tribe of Tigre have Muslims and Christians. We are a civilized people. We are a cultured people. We are a secular country: I am at the offices of the People’s Front (it is actually PFDJ), there can’t be a cross and a picture of St Mary hanging in the office. Just like I can’t go to a priest or a sheikh and tell him what to preach on Sunday or Friday. We are a secular country. And we can’t have religion in the government or our schools. Sure, we may teach religion as a subject. But we can’t use religion as a basis to admit or to deny admission. Otherwise, we will be like all these countries in the region whose people are at each other’s throats. Arrest? Yes, we will arrest people if they endanger our unity. Human rights? There are countries who claim to be democratic with human rights where people go to bed hungry and are homeless. We have human rights here and nowhere else in the world. Healthcare, clean water, food: that’s human rights. And we have it here. I can travel anywhere, get on a bus, with nobody asking me where or why.
Conclusion
What a nice and very reassuring Musulman. He is a good Mohammedan! I wish there were more like him. With people like him, our future is assured. The government never tells priests and sheikhs what to say in their sermons. Never. Only those who endanger national unity are arrested and only after they had their day in court. Always. There is freedom of movement: an Eritrean can travel anywhere, anytime. No need for any “moving permit” or “exit visa” or Regret Letter. Private schools or religious schools should not be allowed to exist, even if our laws say they can. We are very civilized ancient young people with fealty to law, except when they are inconvenient. What is human rights without food and clean water, amirite? Amirite? We are a civilized people with a long history of law and culture and sophistication. We are young and old, the gateway to civilization and with people like Alamin Mohammed Seid once in a while coming to assure us that the messages we hear daily from Isaias Afwerki, Yemane Gebreab, Yemane Gebremeskel is indeed shared by all Eritreans, regardless of their religion, ethnicity and gender, why, we have a very bright future! So bright it is blinding and we need special glasses–corrected to PF vision– to see it.
Happy Independence Day! Happy Mother’s Day! Ramadan Kareem! Oops, I mixed State, Gender and Religion. Hope to see Alamin M Seid at the dais beaming slavishly at Isaias Afwerki.
